Summer is when a lot of families travel because kids are out of school. Even though we all think of vacations as relaxing, there can be a lot of stress associated with planning and executing a family getaway. Do you get overwhelmed with too many choices and then can’t make a decision? Do you have a child who hates change in all its forms so visiting a new place or having a new routine even for a week is awful for them (and then maybe everyone else too)?
An important thing to consider is what kind of expectations do you have for a family vacation? With Instagram and Facebook, we only see the photos and videos that other people curate for us; we aren’t seeing their “real” life, but it is easy to forget that. We may develop an expectation of what our family vacation is supposed to look like, and if it doesn’t match that, we become frustrated and disappointed. And that is when the real fun starts, right?
Consider sharing the book My Trip to the Beach by Deedee Cummings with the kids to take on an ipad, phone, (or the real paper thing) along on the journey. This book is about a kiddo who dreams they are at the beach and practices mindful tips to help calm tense nerves and focus on the best parts of their trip. It is a technique that can be used anywhere, including in the backseat of a 12-hour car ride!
If you’re visiting a big city, you may be tempted to “see it all,” but this is probably not a great idea, especially if you have kids along for the journey. Rather than packing loads of activities into each day, have one thing you will see and several other things in your back pocket that could be added to the list but don’t have to be. If anyone feels tired or cranky after seeing the “one big thing,” get some rest. You’ve done what was on your list so enjoy that accomplishment!
The reality is that you’ll never see and do everything you may like to see and do on a trip, particularly if the trip is to a place that offers lots to see and do, like Chicago or Washington, DC. You could live in those places and take weeks to see and do
everything if only time and money (and that cranky teenager) weren’t limitations.
Think about the varied interests of the people on the trip with you. If one child loves animals, make sure to do an animal activity once on the trip. If another child loves art, make sure an art activity is done once on the trip. If everyone gets to do one thing that is their favorite, you can always remind them that they got their pick, now someone else in the family gets a pick. It won’t eliminate the complaining completely, but it will temper it.
If things go awry (and they will because it’s life), try to see the humor. Someone I know took photos every time their child threw himself on the ground after taking a hike (which was the “one thing” on the parents’ vacation list). The parents collected these photos into an album that the entire family now laughs at, looking back at all the tantrums this particular child threw. Even if in the moment that vacation time wasn’t great, it could be the basis of some amazing memories down the road. Remember– it’s a vacation. Make it fun!